A Father's Comfort III
by Silver Sentinel
Summary: After an outing with his sensei Raphael ends up doing something that ends up haunting him. Splinter sees his son struggling with his emotions and has to try his best to help his him.
1. The Incident

**Author's Note: ****Hello there, as I promised here's part three to this series I made. Now it's Raph's turn. I'm sorry if this seems rushed or not as deep but I have no knowledge of the topic at hand so I wasn't sure how to write things. So that's why it's may not be as good. Still I hope it's alright. Enjoy.**

Chapter 1: The Incident

The darken sky blanketed the city of New York in a majestic night, the moon up in the sky, streets empty except for the occasion car or person. And also the chirp of a cricket if one were to listen enough. Above on the roof tops two figures could be seen hoping across, soaring over various buildings. One tall and the other short. On a small five story building is when the two figures stopped to take a rest. The moon light cascading over the red bandana of Raphael as he looked forward at his Sensei, who turned towards him.

"Are you calm now Raphael?" Splinter asked as he watched his winded son.

Earlier there was an incident in the lair, involving Mikey pranking Raph, which went a little too far. Apparently the orange clad turtle found it funny trying to mess with the emerald green turtle's bike. Apparently Mikey set it so an air bag would be set off once the red clad turtle sat down on it. Apparently the prank back fired when Raph had already retracted the kick stand. The air bag popping up caused the turtle jump off and the bike fell and the paint was scratched.

Now Raph could take a normal prank that is sent his way but when it came to one that involved his bike, then it crossed the line. Steamed he hunted down his younger brother, and in a huge fury tried to pummel him. Leo and Don saw this wasn't any normal type of rage and tried to setting the red clad brother down, but Raph snapped at them both and tried to get at Mikey. If the two brothers hadn't intervened Mikey would have be in for a new world of hurt.

Soon Splinter got involved and just the sight of the rat sensei, Raph stopped his hostel reign, but still furious. The whole story was retold and once said and done Raph was still angry. Seeing this Splinter thought it would be a good idea to burn off that anger with a nightly run. They have been at it for at least an hour, and it started to slowly work.

Raph softly panted some as he looked his sensei in the eye, "Almost."

"Then we shall continue then," Splinter turned as he was about to run but was stopped at his son's voice.

"Master Splinter I don't see the point of this, I mean I'm fine and I promise not to kill Mikey even though he deserves it," Raph complained, mentally groaned as he tried to stop the run.

"Raphael, you are easily angered and the way you displayed it back at the lair shows you don't have proper control over it," Splinter spoke as he turned and faced his son. "Your brother will be punished for what he did later. Until then we will continue with our exercise until your anger leaves."

Raph sighed as he heard his father but reluctantly followed as they jumped roof to roof once more. Nothing but silence between the two except for the occasional pant from Raph. He's winded a bit but still had plenty of energy to burn, which is unfortunate since Splinter made it seem like they were going to go for hours.

True his anger slowly seeped away but he was still angry at what Mikey did. He made it clear that no one was allowed to touch his bike no matter what and his little brother ignored it and now he has to spend an hour repainting it.

He was knocked out of his train of thought as Splinter stopped and held up his hand, indicating him to halt. "What's wrong sensei?"

The rat's whiskers twitched as his eyes narrowed, "We're not alone." Just then his eyes widen as he turned, "Raphael, get down!"

The red clad turtle did as he was told and dropped to the ground, just that instant a cluster of arrows sailed over him and bounced off the hard surface of the roof. They were under attack as he got back to his feet and pulled out his Sais.

It was then a dozen Foot ninja came out and surrounded the two. Both master and student ended up going back to back as they kept their eyes on their enemies. "Raphael can you call and alert your brothers?" Splinter asked as he held his walking stick up in a defensive position.

"Sorry sensei, but I didn't grab my shell cell before leaving the lair."

"Then we are on our own then."

"Don't worry sensei, we can handle them," Raph smirked, knowing he could handle anyone that was thrown his way.

"My son, don't get overconfident," Right as those words left the Foot struck.

Raph ducked as one swung a katana and countered with an uppercut before punching him across the face. Another came and swung their weapon but Raph blocked with his Sai before doing a quick jab to the stomach before head butting the guy. The red clad turtle smirked as the battle continued, the run had pumped him up some and now a fight only added to it which he liked.

Splinter easily blocked the incoming sword blows with his walking stick. Two Foot ninja were double teaming the rat but they weren't fairing. Splinter blocked one blow and struck the guy on the wrist with is walking stick, causing the sword to drop to the ground before he repeated with the other guy. Twirling the stick he then used the thick part of his weapon and swung it against their heads, knocking them to the ground.

An ear twitched as a high pitch sound soared through the air. Splinter ducked as an arrow sailed passed him. Both eyes looked as he saw a lone Foot with a bow and quiver on him. He had to be dealt with now. Cracking his tail like a whip Splinter hit one ninja that was coming from behind before leaping towards the ranged ninja. He passed a few more Foot ninja till he got to the one he's aiming for. A few yards left to go Splinter jumped in the air and soared in a jump kick. He made contact and knocked the Foot back, the blow stunning the guy.

He then looked over at Raphael and saw his son fairing fine on his own. He was taking down the foot easily as the number of their enemies dwindled. Both eyes then saw another Foot coming and Splinter held his walking stick up as metal collided with wood. Both the man and rat grunted as they pushed each other back.

Splinter pushed the guy back a couple of feet before something unexpected happened. The Foot ninja then removed his left hand from the handle of the katana and threw something into Splinter's eyes.

"AH!" the rat cried out as he broke his hold and stumbled back, both of his eyes now burning. Apparently a chili bomb was thrown in his eyes, blinding him. Not being able to see made Splinter lose focus as a blow to the head was felt, knocking the rat to the ground.

Both of his eyes managed to open just a bit to see the same Foot ninja drop the sword and pull out a knife. Raising his hand the guy brought the knife down, but Splinter grabbed the guy's wrist, stopping the fatal blow for now. The ninja towered over Splinter as he tried to overpower the rat and stab him, but there was resistance.

Splinter's arms started to burn as he tried to stop the Foot ninja's stab. His free hand had been pinned down to prevent him from getting leverage. His teeth gritted as he tried to push back but the knife kept getting lower, getting closer to his heart. Fear started to build up in the rat as he realized that he may die right now.

"Father!" both ears heard his son's voice as a grunt was made and all of a sudden the resistance was gone.

Confusion ran through the rat's head, both eyes were shut so he couldn't see what was going on. The resistance gone but the presence still towering on him. Both eyes slowly started to open as the burning in his eyes decreased, but then both of them widen as he saw his attacker. A metal tip stuck out from his chest, his son's bulky figure behind him.

The Foot ninja then keeled over and onto the ground, a small pool of blood now starting to form from the wound. Splinter then looked over at Raphael, a shocked and almost terrified look on his face.

"Raph...Raphael?" Splinter's voice suddenly managed to say.

"S-Sensei…a…a-a-are you…ok?" Raph's shaky works came out. Apparently he must have been in some sort of shock.

"Yes…my son…I am," the rat managed to responded he got to his feet. Both eyes scanned the area and found all the Foot ninjas down and out…well not all of them. Both eyes then looked and found his son's empty right hand shaking, and covered with some blood.

"Sensei…" Raph started to speak, his works shaking as his breathing became uneven. "Is he…"

Both of Splinter's eyes looked over at the down ninja, a pool of blood already forming. Both eyes saw the Sai that was stabbed in the guy's back. He wasn't moving, he didn't even need to check to confirm it. "Yes Raphael…he's gone."

Footsteps were heard as Splinter turned and saw his son running over to the edge of the roof and threw up. The upchucking sounds hitting his ears as the realization finally hit him. His son, Raphael just had his first kill. Out of all his sons Raph is the first one to experience this, and the worst thing, he didn't know what to do. A sigh left the rat as his ears flatten against his head. Still looking at his son Splinter then walked over to the red clad turtle, who was still upchucking.

"Breathe my son, you'll be ok," Splinter rubbed circles on his son's shell.

After a minute Raph managed to stop throwing up, heaving as he tried to recollect himself. "I don't feel good…it's like I'm feeling sick."

"It is alright, it's good you feel this way," Splinter responded. Even if he didn't know what it was like killing someone he still knew signs that distinct how one felt about it.

"Why?"

"It proved…you didn't enjoy it…the sight made you feel sick."

The emerald green turtle processed these words but there was something else he felt. He wasn't sure what it was but yet didn't say anything. After finally getting himself together he moved away from the ledge and walked over to the down ninja. The sight of the guy made Raph's stomach churn, threatening to bring about another hurling session. Still he managed to stomach it as he reached and pulled the Sai out.

Splinter watched what his son did, he seemed to be handling this well…a little too well. "My son…are you ok?"

"I'm fine," Raph responded in his normal voice, his shell to his father.

"Are you sure? Because-"

"Sensei I'm fine…" Raph responded quickly, cutting off his father. "Please…can we go home now?"

The rat opened his mouth to make a response but stopped. Apparently his son wasn't fine, and yet he seemed to not want to talk about it. It was understandable, a first kill is traumatic and it could maybe take his sons some time to process this. So he gave a nod, "Alright my son."

Twenty minutes later both master and student were approaching the door that lead to the lair. The walk back was spent in silence. Neither Splinter nor Raph had said anything. Splinter is concerned for what his son maybe feeling but didn't want to pry right now, not sure how his son would react. Just as they were in front of the concealed door Raph spoke up.

"Sensei…uh…"

"What is it my son?"

The red clad turtle adverted his eyes as he spoke, "Can…can you please…not say anything about what happened?"

An eye rose on Splinter, "How come Raphael?"

"I just…don't want them to know yet…please I'll tell them myself but…please I don't want them to know."

Splinter saw the distress on his son's face and apparently could understand. Chances are his brothers would ask questions and that was something the emerald green turtle couldn't handle right now. As much as he didn't want to do it he knew he had to respect his son's wishes. "I will not say anything."

"Thank you sensei," Raph bowed some but was stopped by his master's hand on his shoulder.

"But remember this, if this continues to bother you, I'm here to talk. No matter what time of the day it is."

This comment made Raph freeze some, now making him feel a bit bad. Still he shoved the emotions back as he nodded, "Yes sensei." The door was then opened as Raph walked in, Splinter watching his son go in before he followed, not liking the feeling he was getting from what's to come.

The rest of the night went on as normal as it could. They were greeted by everyone, but Raph walked by all of them and headed for his room. They were confused at this and turned to their sensei to ask what was wrong with Raph. Splinter said that he wasn't feeling good, which wasn't a lie since Raph really wasn't feeling good.

Splinter went to sleep that night, worried about his son's wellbeing. He knew a first kill was big and one would want to talk about what happened, but Raphael is always stubborn. He wouldn't admit there was something wrong with him emotionally. It pained him but he would have to wait till his second oldest to come to him, that's the only way he can help.

Raph on the other hand is wide awake in his hammock, sleep eluding him for the most part. He tossed and turned, but he didn't close his eyes. When he did that the first time a chill ran down his spine as the memory came back. That one Foot ninja's face, well mask, would be staring at him, just staring. Then his distraught voice being heard, accusing him of what he did. Both eyes opened once again, making the images disappear.

He just laid there in his hammock, wired awake because of the images he's seeing. The same feelings from earlier coming back, but the red clad turtle shoved them back, not wanting to deal with it. "It's nothing…" he said to himself, shaking his head. "Just my mind playing tricks nothing more." Once again he closed his eyes to try and sleep but the images came once again, preventing him to get the sleep he needed.

The next few days progressed but Raph seemed to get a bit worse. The day after the emerald green turtle wasn't talking as much, he ignored everyone's comments and kept to himself. And also it seemed like the smallest thing would cause him to snap. Mikey made one joke about Raph not looking good and the red clad turtle yelled at him saying to mind his own business before storming off somewhere else.

Splinter watched as his son got worse and even tried to initiate a conversation with him, but Raph would always say he's fine. Nothing more could be gotten out of him. Raph on the other hand was struggling with how he's enduring with his emotions. A feeling of dread kept building up inside of him and it wouldn't go away. He kept pushing it back but it always came back strong. What's worse is that the Foot ninja's face kept popping up almost everywhere. He couldn't rid himself of the image and wanted it gone. It was almost like he was being haunted by the guy.

It was three days after the event when things picked up more. They were all practicing, doing weaponless spars, mainly because Splinter thought using them would only make his son's condition worse.

Both of his eyes watched as Leonardo and Donatello were currently in a session. They were circling one another and throwing blows at one another as the rat sensei corrected any mistakes in the blows.

"Donatello, don't overextend your arm, you'll leave yourself open for an attack," Splinter corrected his second youngest.

The purple clad turtle nodded as he continued to trade blows and followed his sense's advice. Still Leo countered the hits by blocking. This went on for a few minutes until Splinter tapped his walking stick on the ground, motioning for them to stop.

"That is enough my sons, you did well." The two turtles bowed before their sensei before moving over to the sidelines. "Michelangelo, Raphael it is your turn."

"Awesome," Mikey responded as he stood on his feet and went to the center.

Raph remained silent as he took a couple of breathes before standing up as well and joining his youngest brother. Once ready they both bowed at their sensei before bowing to each other before getting into stand. They both circled on another as one waited for the other to make their move.

Raph's eyes then closed as his head shook, an all too familiar feeling resurfacing. Both eyes open but apparently Mikey took advantage of the distraction and made a jab to the red clad turtle's side, causing the turtle to wince and stumble back.

"Raphael, focus," Splinter's voice called out.

The emerald green turtle only grunted in response as he resumed his battle stance. As they circled once more Raph froze as his eyes tried to play tricks on him, it caused his eyes to widen. Instead of Mikey he changed into the same Foot ninja from before. His heart started to pound as he saw this and it was then the guy made a charge for him. Out of reaction Raph ducked at the punch and uppercut the guy, making him fly and hit the ground. The red clad turtle then jumped onto the guy and held him down as he pulled out a Sai and raised it above his head.

"No!" Leo and Don shouted as they moved and grabbed their brother's hand, stopping the blow from coming.

Of course Raph struggled but it was then the image of the Foot ninja left and was replaced with his brother, who was frozen and had a shocked look on his face. Raph's breathing increased as he dropped his weapon and got up, moving back some.

"Raph, what the shell were you thinking!?" Leo shouted.

"I…I…" the red clad turtle tried to explain but couldn't

The tap of Splinter's walking stick echoed, catching their attention. "Michelangelo are you are alright?"

"Yes…sensei," Mikey responded as he got to his feet.

The age rat then turned to talk to his second eldest but saw that he was leaving the dojo, much to the confusion to everyone.

"What is with Raph?" Don asked out loud. "He's been acting weird for the past few days."

"I don't know, but it must be serious if he nearly killed Mikey," Leo responded.

Splinter heard his son's words and decided to get to the bottom of things. "My sons, practice your katas, I need to talk to your brother and I'll be back." Without hearing a response the rat sensei exited the dojo in pursuit of his son. He caught him about to go up to his room, "Raphael, wait!"

The red clad turtle stopped and slowly turned, facing his master a worried look on his face. "Yes sensei?"

"My son…what happened back there?" he stopped right in front of his son, eyes locked onto him.

"It's nothing…just a reaction," Raph lied, not wanting to tell the truth.

"Raphael, please don't lie."

"Look it was nothing I couldn't handle."

"You nearly killed your brother," The comment made Raph wince, the expression clearly visible to the rat sense.

"Please sensei…I don't want to talk about it."

"My son…you are troubled still…the…incident that occurred is still plaguing you, am I right?"

That comment made Raph silent, not responded after a few seconds. "Please Master Splinter…I don't want to…"

"You are suffering because of it…you have some pent up emotions."

Raph turned, not able to look at his father, "Please…I just…need to be by myself."

Splinter sighed at this, his son was again pushing him away from a talk they needed to have. He could have ordered him to do so but in his son's mental condition it wouldn't help. So he had to let it go, "Very well my son…but please…anytime you want to talk I'm always available."

Raph hung his head as he started up the stairs, "Thank you…" Both eyes watched as his son walked up and eventually to his room. The situation is hitting him big time and there's nothing he can do to help right now.

Things progressed normally for the rest of the day, Raph stayed in his room most of the day and avoided everyone. His brothers were curious as to what was going on but Splinter told them to give him space, which they followed. That night Splinter once again went to sleep worried about his son, this couldn't go on for much longer.

Sometime during the night as everyone slept Raph tossed and turned in his hammock as he tried to once again try to sleep but once again the Foot ninja's face appeared, accusing him of his death. Every time it happened once his eyes closed, making him lose sleep. He hadn't been able to get a good night's sleep and it was already starting to take its toll. Raph's dead tired and couldn't help but close his eyes but that's when the images came back waking him back up.

He then sat up in his hammock, breathing increased as the images got worse. His head shook as he tried to rid himself of them but they weren't leaving. He wanted them gone, he no longer wanted to hear the voice. "I can't take it….I want them to stop!"

Tossing his blanket aside Raph hopped out and exited his room. A minute later he stood in front of his father's room, hesitating.

"_Anytime you want to talk I'm always available," _his father's words returning to him. He knew his sensei told him anytime but did this count? He didn't want to disturb his father's sleep but he couldn't take it anymore. Being careful he reached up and slid the door opened and entered and then closed it.

Both eyes scanned the darken room as he spotted his father's sleeping form. Moving over he stood by his father's bed and kneeled down. Apparently his footsteps were loud because the age rat turned as both eyes opened, fully being awake as he saw his son's presence.

"Raphael…what's wrong?" He asked, even though he knew the answer.

"Please…make them go away," Raph's weaken and distressed voice could be heard.

A minute later a match was sparked to life as the burning stick was brought to a candle, lighting it. The flame illuminated a small part of the room as it was placed down between both master and student. After seeing his son in distress the rat sensei woke up, knowing his son needed him right now. A talk is going to happen, a much needed on.

Both of them sat down across from one another, both silent. Splinter set the candle down as he took a big breathe of air, "Tell me my son, what is wrong?"

Raph looked at the candle, focusing on the flame. "I can see the guy's face…every time I close my eyes. He's just…looking at me…accusing me of his death. It won't go away and I can't take it anymore."

"Unfortunately Raphael…that is what always happens. A part of our minds always retains something of the like because we feel guilt of what we did."

Raph then looked up at his father, taken back at the statement. "But…sensei…why would I feel guilty? I mean if…if I didn't…you know…stop him then he wouldn't have killed you."

Splinter nodded at this, "I know…you did what you had to do. It was me or him that night and unfortunately it was him who died."

"But…why did I feel sick afterwards?" Both eyes finally looked upon his father, his voice low and a little shaky.

"Believe it or not my son, that is a good thing," That caused a surprised look from the emerald green turtle. The expression already wanting an explanation. "It means you did not like what you did, what you felt sickens you. Forgive the term but it proves you are human. Tell me, how do you feel about killing now?"

Raph took a bit of time trying to compose himself, trying to think about what he was feeling. "I…I don't like it…it was too much of a shock and…I don't wish to experience it again."

"This is good as well…it means that killing doesn't have a hold of you. You do not enjoy it and you won't want to commit to it again."

"So…this is supposed to be normal?"

"Yes…it'll pass, but it'll take a lot of effort. But it'll help a lot more if you have love ones there to aid you."

"I…it's just that…I…um…" Raph had trouble to say so instead he said something else. "I'm sorry…I waited to talk to you."

"Why didn't you talk to me sooner?" Splinter asked, curious as to why they hadn't had this talk much earlier.

Raph sighed as he started talking again, "Sensei…I'm not one to express my emotions…"

"Why not."

"It's just…feels as if it's a weakness…just simple as that."

"It is not healthy to keep those kinds of emotions suppressed. They will only build up until you burst, which is something that'll turn out bad for you."

"I know but…it's just not me."

Splinter then reached over and placed a hand on his son's shoulder, causing the turtle to look at his father. "Raphael, one should not be ashamed to show their softer emotions, it is nothing to worry about. This experience may have shaken you up emotional but it's not good to bottle that up. You need to express your distraught emotions otherwise it'll destroy. You did a good thing by coming to me when you were ready. I am here for you and I know your brothers will be here to help you."

"I…thank you father…" Raph managed to say, slowly starting to feel a bit better.

"One last thing…I am grateful that you save my life my son, I am indebted to you," he bowed to his son.

"No you're not," Raph managed to say with a yawn. This was something he didn't want his father to own him. Not after what he did and because it wasn't right. "You own me nothing."

Splinter saw the yawn and realized that maybe they could continue this later when they were rested. "My son, why don't we continue this in the morning, when we're both focused?"

"Yes…I think that's a good idea," Raph nodded, but then a fear of not being able to sleep came back. The ninja's face popping back up came back as his fist clenched and shook. Splinter got up and was about to blow out the candle when he felt a hand on his robe. Turning he saw Raphael holding it.

"Something else wrong?"

"I…I don't want to be alone right now," Raph's shaky voice spoke. "I can't…I don't want to be alone with my thoughts."

A feeling of Déjà vu hit the aged rat as he heard this. This was a secret question his son sent out, since he didn't really want to ask it. He knew Raphael needed someone with him if he were to sleep, and he knew just how to help.

Blowing out the candle Splinter then helped his son to his feet, "I won't leave you by yourself my son, now please come."

"Thank you," Raph responded as he was lead over to his father's bed. Pulling the covers out Splinter eased his son down onto the bed before laying down himself, covering themselves with the blanket.

Splinter then rubbed circles on his son's shell, "Sleep my son, I am here and there's nothing to worry about."

Raph sighed as he felt the soothing comfort of his father, glad to know he's not alone to deal with his emotions by himself. Both of his eyes slowly started to drop as exhaustion started to set in. "Thank you…father." A feeling of safety now covered him now since he was in his father's presence.

"You are welcome," Splinter responded as his son started to drift off, and soon followed. That night Raph managed to get the sleep he needed. The Foot ninja's face never came, nor his voice. The red clad turtle finally had the peace of mind he needed. Thanks to his father, who was there to keep him safe from all those thoughts.

_**A/N: Hope you like. I tried hard on this and believe me I was close to breaking this into different chapter. But I wanted to have this scene at the end for the first chapter because it's a trend i'm following. Anyway I'll try to work on the second chapter when I can. Till then thank you for reading. **_


	2. Opening Up

**Author's Note: ****Hey there, sorry for the long wait for this chapter. It's not dead, just takes me long to update. Now this story may not be as good as my previous two stories but i'm trying. Now in this one Raph may be out of character in this chapter but I tried. In finished this chapter so I can do the last so I hope it's good. Enjoy.**

Chapter 2: Opening Up

A loud sound slowly stirred Master Splinter from his sleep as the world slowly returned to him. Both eyes opened as his senses slowly started to come to him. The sound started to clear up as it started to become recognizable. He turned his head and found his second oldest son snoring. It wasn't unknown that Raphael snored, heck his youngest son complained about it the time he had to temporary room with him a while back.

Still, even though it stirred him the old rat is glad to see his son sleeping soundly after what happened last night. It had been a rough night for his son, and was glad to see him finally getting the sleep he deserved.

He then looked at his stand next to his bed and saw that his clock read that it was almost seven. Just about the time he would usually get up. So just deciding to go with it he slowly rose out of bed. Just as he was about to rise a tug on his robe made him stop.

Raising an eye he looked down and saw his son had a grip on his rope, while he is still asleep. Splinter couldn't help but smile at this, it was almost as if his son was a child again. Most of the time when they came to him when they had a nightmare they would always hold on to him like this. They didn't want their father to go anywhere while they were sleeping. An innocent memory, being relived while his sons were in their teen years.

Slowly he moved his hand and carefully pried Raphael's hand from his robe, but apparently he wasn't gentle enough. The emerald green turtle moved as his eyes slowly flashed open. Looking up at his sensei's face as he started to wake up. Once awake Raph then planted his hands on the bed and pushed him up and let out a yawn as he sat down.

"Morning my son, I'm sorry I woke you," Splinter softly said. He was hoping Raph would be able to sleep much longer than this, since he found out that he barely had any sleep for the past few days.

"It's alright sensei," The red clad turtle responded as he let out another yawn, remembering where he was now after waking up. He felt a little embarrassed about going to his father and asking to let him sleep with him, but was glad he did. He was finally able to get much needed sleep. "I would have been glad to at least get an hour of sleep."

"Was your sleep a peaceful one?"

Raph nodded in response as a small smile appeared on his face. "I…didn't see his face…nothing…I finally got the first bit of sleep in days."

Splinter nodded as he looked at the clock again, the hands showing a few minutes till seven. There was still time before his other sons would wake up for breakfast, and right now since he and his second oldest were alone now would be the best time. He rose up to his feet, "Raphael, please sit with me."

Raph watched as he father walked over to the sitting table he had and followed as well, wondering what was going on now. Moving across from his sensei he sat down and looked at his father, waiting for him to say something.

"Raphael," Splinter finally said as he looked at his son in the eye. "Today, I think we all shall forgo practice.

This caused the turtle to raise an eye, curious as to why he was being told this. "Uh…ok that sounds good…but why?"

The rat took a breath before speaking once again, hoping his son will go along with this. "I believe you should tell your brothers of what happened."

Raph's face fell as he heard this, both eyes now staring at the ground in silence. "I…I'm not sure."

"Why is that?"

Raph continued to look at the floor as he spoke, "I just…I'm not sure I…"

Splinter saw his son struggling trying to say something and inputted his case, "My son, It would help a lot to talk this over to them. It may not be the way you normally interact around your brothers but it'll help a lot in the long run. And it may end the discomfort you feel from your first kill with the help."

Raph remained silent as he tilted his head and looked at the ground, lost in thought. He started to consider his father's words but his pride kept on getting in the way. He didn't like getting emotional, especially if it were to his brothers. Still, his father is always right in these kind of things. Plus he knew that things weren't going to go back to normal that easily.

A hand on his shoulder knocked him out of his train of thought as he looked up to see his father's face. "Raphael, please just think about it. You will know what to do when you're ready for it."

Hearing this the emerald green turtle could only nod at the response. He really wanted to consider it but his pride kept on getting in the way. "Ok I will," he nodded.

"Good, now lets go and gets some breakfast before training," Splinter responded as he helped his son to his feet and the two headed for the door.

Sometime later after breakfast all four brothers and their sensei were in the dojo, seated and facing each other. All eyes were on Splinter as he explained what they would be doing today. "My son's today's training will different from what we usually do. Instead of training our bodies we will strengthen our minds."

"Does that mean we're going to be doing a meditation session sensei?" Leo asked, which his other brothers groaned at mentally. They didn't really like meditation sessions at all and dreaded it when it came. Mostly because sitting around in place wasn't their preferred training method.

"No, my son, instead we will be talking, mostly about problems that may plague us."

Raph made a nervous tick on his face as he heard this. Chances are that Master Splinter was trying to get him to talk about what happened, a dirty trick in his book. But yet the way he addressed it suggested that it was his choice to.

"Ok sensei, but how is this supposed to strengthen our minds?" Mikey asked out of curiosity.

"Because in mind we all think that the problems we have don't matter much, but in reality they do. There are times that we would want to ask for help but something within us won't ask. We don't do this because of fear, shame, or pride. We need to be strong to admit it so we can't help the best we can."

"I think we understand," Leo responded with a nod, as well as his brothers.

"So, who would like to be first?" Both of his eyes scanned his sons, waiting for one to volunteer.

All four of them looked at one another, trying to see who was brave enough to go first. Raph looked at his three remaining brothers, he rather they not answer at all so that way he wouldn't have to go. There was no way he was going to do it like this, not this way.

"I…I guess I will," Donny was the first to say, which caused all eyes to focus on him. Everyone unfolded their legs to get comfortable, since chances are this may take a while.

"Go ahead Donatello, remember it doesn't matter what the problem may be. This is a safe zone, no one will make a negative remark about it," Splinter announced as he gave a warning glance at his three remaining sons, making sure his comments stuck.

"Well…you all know how I have a tendency to stay up into the late hours of the night, right?"

"Yes," Leo responded. "We keep telling you to stop it and get some sleep, it's not healthy to keep doing that."

"Leonardo, no berating your brother," Splinter responded.

"But it's true," the blue clad turtle told his father, then looked back at his brother. "Not being mean it just that we care about your health, that's all."

"But…there's a reason I don't sleep till late," the purple clad turtle responded as he looked down at the ground. "I'm…I'm afraid of getting nightmares."

"What?" Raph was the first to respond. "Really? That's it?"

"I know it sounds childish, but I have a tendency to have recurring nightmares all the time…I don't know why it happens, but all I know is that I don't want to experience them so-"

"That's why you stay up at night," Leo finished, receiving a nod in return.

"Yes…I figure…If I don't sleep I can't experience them. If my body is so tired at night I can sleep without dreaming." He looked at everyone else, silence among them as they processed the information he told them all.

Splinter cleared his throat, causing all the focus on him. "It was good that you told us of this. I agree with Leonardo when saying that staying up late isn't good for your health."

"I know…but I'm not sure what to do about it," Donny said, both eyes cast down on the floor. Feeling a bit embarrassed at reveling a childish problem.

"There's nothing to be ashamed about bro," Mikey said, clasping a hand on his brother's shoulder. "We all tend to have nightmares, it's nothing to worry about."

Raph stayed silent as he watched his family talk to his second youngest brother about his problem. To say the least he was surprised that they were understanding about this and were talking on how to help. He listened a few more minutes, hearing them exchange words between one another.

"I may have something that could help you," Leo said.

That caused Donny to raise a confused eye, "Really? What?

"It's an item that can keep nightmares away, do you mind if I give it to you later?"

"Sure," he nodded, mentally smiling at his brother's words.

So time went on as Leo and Mikey went next, announcing their problems to their family. Mikey still had some doubt about being a screw up at some times and how he could get them hurt or even killed one day. Still the others reassured him that despite that they liked how he acted.

Leo had problems about the pressures of leadership and how it started to get to him. And also wondered if he's actually doing a good job about it. The others assured him that he was doing a good job, and that he shouldn't doubt his position. Which started to help him out a lot.

Soon all eyes were trained on Raph, said turtle knew what they were waiting for and in truth wasn't sure if he could.

"Raphael, is there a problem you wish to share with us?" Splinter gently asked.

Raph wanted to growl, this is basically the push his father wanted him to have to admit that something was wrong. Well played but he didn't want to say anything, because he wasn't sure."

"You do not have to if you don't want to," the rat responded, but was met with more silence. "Ok, we'll move on then."

"Wait," Raph called out. He wasn't sure why, he had been given a way out but wasn't sure why, he's going to do it. Looking down it all left him, "Ya'll remember…when Master Splinter and I went out a few days ago?"

The three brothers nodded. "Yeah, it was after that prank Mikey did," Don spoke.

"Well…we ran into some trouble," Raph responded, causing wide eyes at the two.

"What happened?" Leo spoke next, concern now filling the three.

Splinter then looked in Raph's direction, "My son, I can tell them if you want to."

"No Master Splinter…I'll do it," he responded, making the others nervous. "We were ambushed by Foot soldiers and had a scuffle. One of them managed to Blind Master Splinter somehow and was about to strike…but I stopped it…in one of the worst ways."

All three of them raised their eyes, he couldn't possibly mean what they thought, did he.

"You mean…you…" Mikey tried to speak.

"I…I killed him," he finally said, earning a stunned silence through the room. Both eyes closed, refusing to look at his brothers in fear of how they would react. Hopefully they wouldn't be too harsh.

"So…that's the reason why you've been acting different," Leo's soft voice responded, which earned a nod from both his brother and father. "You ok?"

That comment surprised the red clad turtle, he expected something far more different.

"Your brother is still…shaken…by the experience," Splinter responded. "But he seems to be holding up."

"That…must have been a terrible experience," Don responded with sympathy. "I learned that that the first kill can be hard to overcome."

"Well…it is," Raph decided to speak, feeling much better about this. "I'm…I'm sorry for being on edge as of late…it's just that-"

"We understand Raph," Leo responded with a supportive hand on his shoulder. "The memories can be hard to endure, especially if you were put in a combat type of situation."

"Just like practice," Mikey responded, referring to their spar where his brother nearly stabbed him.

"So you…"

"Don't sweat it," Mikey smiled, which caused a smile to appear on his older brother's face.

"We're here for you if you need help with this problem, you don't have to go through it alone," Donny nodded. The other's agreed, which caused a smile to appear on Splinter's face, who looked at his second oldest.

Raph couldn't help but return it, knowing things would be ok at the moment. "Thank you guys…and Master Splinter." He bowed to them, which they returned. This may trouble him for a while longer, but at least his brothers said they would be there to help him. For once, he was glad he opened up to them, and was thankful to his father for getting him to open up.

_**A/N: Hope you like, once again this story may not be as good as the previous two but i'm trying. I guess because the problems in the previous stories are more of what they would feel. Anyway one more chapter left for this story and I promise not to take as long as I did. Till next time.**_


	3. A Day Out

**Author's Note: ****It took a while but I managed to complete this story. I'm glad to have finally finished it. Now this chapter doesn't have that much of a deep conversation like the last two stories but it still shows Splinter and Raph spending time together. I hope you like it. Enjoy.**

Chapter 3: A Day Out

"So…they're a couple?" Don asked from his spot on the couch, eyes on the TV in front of him. Currently he is with his youngest brother Michelangelo and his father Splinter.

"Indeed," The old rat nodded, explaining things about his program to his two sons. It was that time again when the two would spend some time with their father, and today they tried to watch one of his soap operas, but they were having trouble understanding it. "But at least one of them aren't loyal to the other."

"Does that mean one of them is cheating on the other?" Mikey asked from his spot on the backrest of the couch.

"Yes," Splinter smiled as he continued to explain things. "The show gave out various clue as to who it could be but they haven't revealed which one it is."

"Then why are they still together?" Don asked as he leaned back.

"Because they do not know yet," Splinter chuckled.

It was nice of his sons to be taking an interest in his activities. The three loved spending time with each other over these few weeks. Sometimes they would do some one on one activities. Like Mikey and Splinter did calligraphy together and swapped some stories about their day. He and Don usually went on walks together on the surface, day and night. And also the two would sometimes talk as well, discussing about certain things in their lives.

"I'd still say they would have at least figured something out by now," Don claimed as the show started to end.

"They want to build up the suspense," Splinter claimed as he turned the volume down once the show ended.

"That was…interesting," Mikey jumped off the couch and started to stretch.

"Indeed, my sons you don't have to take interest in my stories if you don't want to," Splinter grinned as he watched the two get up.

"It's alright Sensei, we wanted to," Don responded with a smile, along with his brother. "We enjoy this time together."

"And we look forward to it again," Mikey responded next as he started to walk off. "Good luck with later."

"Thank you my son," Splinter waved his son off as he turned to his remaining son. "I thank you for doing that research for me."

"No problem, I just hope you two have fun."

"We will," Splinter nodded as he watched Don walk off. "We're still on for our private session tomorrow."

"Can't wait," Donny gave a thumbs up.

Picking up his walking stick Splinter then walked away from the TV area, and right on time the door from the elevator opened and in came his second oldest. Earlier Raphael informed them that he was going to be in the garage working on his bike.

It had been a few days since the emerald green turtle told his brothers of what he done. And true to their word they helped out their brother whenever they needed it. Every once in a while Raph would start a conversation with his brothers and they listened when he needed it, even Leo managed to without an argument.

Things slowly started to return to normal as Raph started to resume his everyday activities. But still he would be reminded of what he did but at least it wasn't as great as it was before. Still he was in a stage where he could manage.

A day or two afterwards Splinter got it in his mind that he wanted to spend time with his second oldest. That led him to Donatello, who he asked to look up something online, since he wasn't that skilled in technology. Thankfully the thing he needed had been found and now he's going to get his son to go with him at the moment.

"Raphael, a moment if you will," the rat asked with a smile.

An eye rose as the red clad turtle stopped in front of his father, wondering what this is going to be about. "Sure sensei, what's up?"

"I was hoping the two of us could go for a walk on the surface."

Now both eyes rose in surprised, usually going to the surface wasn't permitted, but he noticed that he had been doing the same with Don but now his father wanted to do the same with him. There had to be something else behind this. "Uh…how come sensei, usually you and Donny do this."

That just caused a chuckle to come out of the aged rat, "Indeed, but there was an activity that I hope you'd be interested in partaking in."

"Really? And what is it?"

"Patience my son, that will be a surprise, only if you wish to accompany me."

Raph crossed his arms as he looked at the floor, deep in thought. He wasn't really sure about this, he wasn't one for surprises yet it was his father who is giving it. Still he's being given a chance to go to the surface during the daytime, with permission. Granted it's with his sensei but still it's a win in his opinion. Also he kind of felt a nag to spend time with his father, since he never really did as much. Besides maybe it would be fun.

"Sure, sounds good."

That brought a smile on the rat's face, glad for his son's response, "Thank you, meet me at the entrance once you have your disguise." With a bow Splinter walked off, leaving Raph alone. The red clad turtle then headed for his room, intending to get his street clothes.

Minutes later both sensei and student were on the surface, walking side by side in daylight. They were heading to a destination that only Splinter knew, but as much as he asked Raph still didn't get an answer as to where they're going.

"You will see my son, I want this to remain a surprise," he smiled as he kept walking.

"Ok, but I'm not really keen on surprises," the now disguised turtle responded as he followed his father.

"So, Raphael, how have you been these past few days?"

Raph raised an eye at that, caught off guard at the question. "Well…I'm good, I can at least do the same things I normally do."

Splinter nodded, glad to hear that things were going ok, "Are you able to sleep ok?"

"Yes…that's something I'm glad for," Raph looked at the sidewalk. In reality that was something he was glad for most of all. Any time before he closed his eyes he would always see that Foot ninja's face, and every time it wouldn't leave him. But now ever since the exercise Splinter did and telling his brothers about what he did, he mind felt at ease. Now he could sleep without any problems, mostly.

"It's good to hear you are doing fine, it makes me rest easy to know nothing is troubling you."

"Still," he started again. "I can still see his face every once in a while…but it isn't as bad as it was before."

"This is good," the rat nodded but stopped himself and his son on the sidewalk. Both of them ended up facing one another. "Still…please I ask of you. If something like this happens again please let us know. I do not want anything to go wrong with you all."

"I know…and I'm sorry," Raph looked down.

"You four mean the world to mean…and I don't know what would happen if anything happened to any of you…"

Raph nodded, "Yes sensei, I understand."

Splinter then pulled his son into a small hug, which the turtle returned. Soon they resumed walking for a while, making small talk along the way. After a few more minutes a building soon came before them.

"We are here," Splinter knocked his son out of his train of thought as he looked up.

A frown appeared on his face as he found himself in front of the museum, a slight feeling of disappointment filling him. "Uh…sensei…this is the museum, I'm sorry to say that I'm not really a history kind of person."

That comment only caused a chuckle to come out of Splinter, "I knew you'd say that, but you'll see once we'll inside."

Raph just looked at his father as a few humans walked about, not sure what he meant about that. "Uh…sure…I guess," Raph didn't want to say anything negative about his sensei's suggestion of a place, not really wanting to hurt his feelings, so he sucked it up.

"And also Raphael…today is going to done differently than are rare outings. As of now this day is going to be a day spent as father and son, not master and student."

"What…uh…sen-" he stopped when the rat gave him a look which made him rethink his words. "Uh…father, how come?"

Splinter was happy to answer the question, "Because it feels as if when we are out as sensei and student you're not relaxed enough, this gives you an opportunity to let loose and have fun…plus I would like to spend time with you, something I haven't done outside of training in so long."

Raph nodded, he could understand that but still was quite surprised at his father's suggestion. But then something clicked into his mind, reminding him of the past few weeks. "Wait…is this what you've been doing with Donny and Mikey?"

That caused another chuckle to come out of the rat, "Indeed my son. Your brothers and I have been taking time out of certain days to spend time with one another, as father and son. This is time we've been enjoying."

That more than confirmed his suspicion. He and Leo noticed that Mikey and Don had been with Splinter once in a while, they didn't really take notice when Don started it first. But then when Mikey started doing it they took a bigger notice to it. Now the truth was out. All in all he was for one glad that it happened.

"Well I'm glad for you three, but Se…I mean father, if you wanted to spend time with me then why pick a museum? This is more of Don's sort of place."

A grin appeared on Splinter's face as he heard this, if only the emerald green turtle knew. "Tell you what my son, why don't we make what you call a deal?"

"A deal?" Raph raised in eye in surprise, this is a first hearing his father suggest a bet, which is not like him. "What do you mean?"

"If you don't end up having a good time, then you win, if you do then I win."

"What does the winner get?"

Another chuckle came out of the old rat, "If you win, I'll allow you to have a free pass."

"What!?" Raph's eye widen in surprise, really not expecting that one. "Are you for real? A free pass?"

Ever since the four brothers could remember a free pass is considered the ultimate get out of jail card, so to speak in their family. It could be used to get out of training, to get out of trouble without question, prevent a punishment, avoid a lecture, or best of all, making Splinter turn the other way. Meaning if they were doing something ground able Splinter would forget it happened. It was the ultimate prize to ever get but it was hard to obtain.

Their father only awarded a handful of them throughout their lives. They would have to do something up and beyond, or do something to deserve it. The last pass that was given was to Mikey months ago, who got in trouble for a prank he didn't do and ended up getting punished for it. For a week he had to endure the punishment of doing his brother's chores and being grounded.

Raph shook his head as it was found out that it was him who did the prank as payback. Splinter felt so bad for punishing the wrong child for a week that he gave him the pass. And of course he ended up using it to avoid punishment after staying up all night for a monster movie marathon. He ended up being so tired for training the following day and boy Splinter was going to give it to him but the free pass was cashed in and the punishment avoided.

Knowing this was something that he couldn't pass up he considered it, "What do you get if you win?"

"You will see," he said, holding out his furry paw, indicating a handshake.

Smirking Raph took it, "Deal."

"Good, then let us go my son," Splinter turned and headed up the steps to the building, being followed by his son, smirking at the fact that he could win this.

A few minutes passed after they had entered, the two walked in silence as they passed the displays of art and artifacts that were set up. Just like he thought Raph wasn't interested in them, but yet they didn't stop to look at them. This caused some suspicious from the red clad turtle, not sure what was going on.

"Aren't we looking at the displays?" he asked.

"We are, but these aren't the displays we're to see," before he could ask Splinter beat him to it, "You'll see just keep walking."

Raph held his tongue as they kept moving, watching many displays and humans go by as they walked. He still didn't know about this or what was going on but kept going for a few minutes, where they stopped.

"We are here," Splinter declared.

Raph look and saw another part of the museum with a banner on top. Both of his eyes read the words written and slowly his mouth hung open as what he read.

_NY museum presents: The hall of weapons_

He was taken back at what he just saw, in his life he wouldn't have expected this to happen. This is something that exited him a lot, weapons is something that's he indeed enjoy. And this display is something just for him, there were many things coursing through his mind right now and he wanted to say something but all that came out, "Whoa."

Splinter smiled as he saw his son's reaction, knowing that he would be in a state like this. Walking up and placed a hand on his shoulder, "surprised you, didn't I?"

Raph turned and looked at his father, "Yeah…"

"I had Donatello look up places you would like, and this was in town and I knew you'd enjoy it." With that the two then walked into that wing of the museum, joining a few other people already inside.

The first weapons on display were blades, everything from knives to daggers to swords, short and board in all.

The first set they saw were knives and daggers. "Whoa," Raph said as he looked upon the weapons. Finding stilettos, switch blades, bowie knives, push daggers, and trench knives.

Splinter joined his son and looked at the weapons inside, amazed at the quality and detail of them. "These weapons are good and high quality, perfect for our profession."

"You can say that again, never have I seen such blades like this," Raph smirked as he moved down, now looking at the swords. Both of them were amazed to see some ninja based swords. Like Leo's katana, but with designs on the blade. A scrimitar, twin tang swords, and many others. All of which were ones that Leo would love to have, shell Raph wouldn't mind having one.

"If only we had weapons like this," Raph commented.

"Indeed, but we should be glad with what we managed to get."

"I know," the red clad turtle nodded. "It's just one of those thoughts."

"Still I know what you mean."

For the next couple of hours the two continued to look at each of the displays, all holding different kinds of weapons. Stuff like spears, throwing weapons, and even modern weapons like guns. Even though they didn't use weapons like those they still looked at them, fascinated at them. Every once in a while Splinter would give some interesting facts about the weapons they were looking at. This information was welcomed by the burly turtle, amazed at the facts.

Even after looking at them all they went back and looked at them once more, enjoying them once more. Currently they stood in front of a large display case that held ninja weapons, this one sparking their interest the most.

"Man, they have it all here," Raph commented. "Kunai, ninja stars, Kamas, Tonfas, throwing knives…if only we had hardware like this."

"Indeed, weapons like this would be beneficial to our battles," Splinter commented. "And I see good secondary weapons you four would be proficient using."

"You know father…even though we're at a museum, I had a great time," The emerald green turtle smiled. "Which means…I lost."

Splinter chuckled at this, glad to see his son still smiling, "I knew you would and I'm glad you enjoyed yourself."

"So what do you win then?" Raph asked, curious as to what Splinter would want for winning their bet, a little nervous as to what it could be.

"Oh yes…what is it that I want," Splinter smirked as he pretended to think, wanting to make his son sweat a bit. The face that he made priceless. "What I would want…is to go out on another outing like this, only if you're up to it."

That caught the red clad turtle off guard, he was surprised to hear his father say that. He was basically asking to spend more time with him, more of a father and son outing just like now. At first he wasn't sure of it, but then he started to think about the day they had so far. Even if they went to here only he still had a good time with his father. He was starting to see why his younger brothers started to hang out with Splinter. Maybe he could get in with this, he enjoyed it a lot.

A grin started to form on his face, "You know…I would like that a lot."

"Thank you my son," Splinter smiled, glad to know this.

"_Attention, the hall of weapons will be closing in ten minutes, we hope to see you tomorrow."_ They heard a women on the speaker announce, much to their disappointment.

"Well, looks like our fun has ended," Splinter responded as he and Raph walked to the entrance of the exhibit.

"You know father, why should it end?" Raph smirked, catching his father's attention.

"What do you have in mind?" Splinter asked, curious as to where he's getting at.

"Why don't we head to the movies, I hear there's a movie you expressed wanting to see," the smirk grew wider.

Splinter couldn't help but chuckle again, amused at his son's desire to continue their outing, which he liked. Plus the idea was appealing since he had expressed an interest like this. They could be out for a while longer."

"Very well, I will enjoy this then."

"Cool, because I heard good things about this movie…"

Raph kept talking way after they exited the museum, Splinter listening and adding in his own thoughts now and then. The two enjoyed their chat long as they headed for the local theater, where they enjoyed a much wanted movie. The outing turning to be a great one as they enjoyed spending time with each other. Raph glad that his father taking him out like this, he knew there would be more times like this, he could count on that.

_**A/N: Hope you like. I tried hard with this story, and I hope the end result of this chapter is good. I try hard with this series and i'm glad to be doing it. Now to let you all know, there is another story in this series and this time we focus on Leonardo for this one and see him and Splinter taking time to enjoy each other's company besides training. It'll come out soon, and I hope you'll like it once I get to it. Till next time. **_


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